I’ve been down this road before.

Staring at the path ahead of me as the tearing sky continues to drench me in her raindrops, I robotically place one foot in front of the other, not really caring whether or not my feet move in sync. The doom and gloom of the screeching wind whisper to my ears, as my sense tune out all that is superfluous to the object in front of me. Even with the odd sense of déjà vu, I know I must needs to soldier on, discovering the root of reasons as to why I’ve got to do this all over again.

One would think that, because of the eerily familiar feeling, I would have no trouble navigating this seemingly foreign terrain. But for whatever reason, I just can’t place my finger on it, this is as if I’ve never been here; yet it’s almost as if I have. The shape of that bush, the texture of the ground, I definitely have seen this all before.

The walk seems like the walk of death; no matter how many steps I take, I seem to be no closer to reaching the destination that I aim to seek. The closer and closer I believe I am, the farther and farther it appears to be. Deciding that I don’t want to be walking forever, I break into a run, trying to brute force my way towards my direction. To no avail, the rate at which I drew closer to it matched the rate at which it sped away from me. Tired, exasperated, and upset, I doubled over and lay on the ground, pondering my ridiculous predicament.

Could it be? Could the solution to this madness be that simple? I got back up, ready to take another shot at this madness I seemed to be stuck in. Slowly, but surely and confidently, I started taking little steps back, breaking out of the monotonic pace I had set myself. At first, nothing was happening, which started to really perplex me. But then, things seemed to start clicking in place! The more and more I moved backwards, the closer and closer I seemed to be moving forward. What madness!

As I continued on this oxymoronic path of mine, I started to ponder, how in the world could moving backwards be interpreted as forward progress? Only in some weird twisted sick way would such a fallible idea even be remotely passable as reality. There is no way that such madness could be truth. There was simply no freaking way.

Upon this instance of my epiphany, my whole world shattered, I fell through the cracks, and the view faded to black.

…

I open my eyes. Look all around me. Take in my current environment. I don’t remember how I got here.

I’ve been down this road before.

08.19.10, 1.48-2.17am
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Upon quick inspection, I noticed I changed back and forth between tenses. But you know what, whatever.